Daveur Round One TONIGHT!

Schlitz (2) vs Cadavers (1)
Tuesday Sept. 30th
Hingham C 10:20pm

TONIGHT!

Alright alright alright... new season... new 'daveurs.

Tonight is Schlidaveur number one for the winter season. Management sent out a few invitations for assistant GM positions and we had two new takers to pick up the teams. That conference call just completed within the last two hours and we have right here for you now....

...tonight's rosters.

The Cadavers, Captained by Pete Capraro will have....
Brian in Net.

Pete, Larry, Nelson, Jeff, Stephan, Elliot, Manning, George, iJosh, Billy P, Scott, and Carl Schiller.

For the Schlitz, captained by Dan Gregson we have....

Lizzy in Net.
Dan, Daley, Valenti, DWH, Parker, Roman, Hammitt, Campbell, Kilroy, Chuck, Greg, Kevin Douville, and Blake


The teams were picked with Pete going first as a result of a coin toss. He took Brian Carey as his first pick then things progressed from there. I have listed the teams in the order they were selected... just a little inside management tid-bit for you all...

See you tonight. Go Zombies. Go Suds.

The Blog pays respects to Reg...

The greatest player coach that ever lived... Reg Dunlop has left the building. Embodied by the earthly form of Actor Paul Newman our beloved leader of the Charlestown Chiefs has retired to the "senior league" in the sky.

Not many of us heard the news about Mr. Newman on Saturday without hearing that familiar voice in the back of our heads.....


"Jesus F**king Christ Joe! The brought their f**king TOYS with them!"

or even....

"Hanrahan! Hanrahan she's a dyke! I know! Susanne sucks p*ssy!"

Or... even this gem... one of my favs... uh... NOT SAFE FOR WORK!



...and of course the greatest pre-game speech in the history of all sports.


Thanks for the laughs Reg... we'll miss ya.
I know that a lot of you are Slapshot fans... feel free to leave your favorite quote (Newman or anyone else) in the comments section.

Summer 08 Season Wrap

Well Team we come to the end of another exciting season of Schlidaveur hockey. This brings to a close the thrid full season of our new incarnation as two teams spawned from the original Cadavers Franchise. In that time you have to be happy with how things have gone. Three titles for the new Schlitz begining with Summer 07, continuing in Winter 08 (which was played against the Cadavers), and then Summer 08! Especially when you count that the Cadavers lost two championship games of thier own in that time. Thats 3 seasons, 3 championships, and 5 Championship Game Appearances. Wow, that's pretty good.

This season for the first time we were split into seperate divisions, both at the D level, but still had a number of Schlidaveur events during the season. There was really quite a bit of cross play between the divisions so it was really a transparent change. This did allow for both teams to make a nice playoff run, without having to play each other and possibly eliminate one of the teams.

Anyway we set off with high expectations, given past sucess and even added a few new faces to our humble band of skaters.

The summer started out with a bang for the Schlitz and a fizzle for the Cadavers but we were off and running. The early part of the season had its share of clunkers like this, and this one the night the Celtics won, and this wasn't good at all. The early going on the Schlidaveur events saw some interesting play also. The Campbelldaveur and Scorapaloozadaveur were both fun nights at the rink and were a bright spot in the tough early going. It took the third 'daveur and a momentous evening to get the Zombies thier first win, some six games in.
The next 'daveur came courtesy of GM Roman Kurin and was dubbed Reversedaveur. Things seemed to come around, despite ourselves, and both teams saw some success. This season also marked the begining of an interesting development with our Russian friends and their other team the Sitniks. We would watch them with interest as the season ended...
'daveur number five was another memorable team on team night with Jim Sullivan playing keeper for the victors! A few more bumps in the road, positve and negative and that would leave the Finaldaveur to wrap up the short summer season.
Both teams would start the playoffs strong. Zombies beat the 'suckas, and the Schlitz beat the Call. The Cads would continue to roll, but the Suds stumbled in game two against the Scapegoats. (we'd hear from them later too...). The Cadavers would win again and make their way to thier Championship game against El Tigre. That one didn't end the way we wanted, but the Schlitz still had hope thanks to a win against the Blues, and some help from the Sitniks.
That meant a Championship Game rematch with the 'goats. That one ended with the desired result. A nice way to finish out the season. Well played one and all.

There was another first this season... this one will be sure to become tradition. Hockey at the Beach. A great time had by all out on Duxbury beach well into the summer night.

Attached you will find end of season total stats, team statistics, and then a whole batch of Playoff numbers from this season.

Take a gander at that line from Scoring Champion Nelson Sharfman. That would be 26 points on 12 goals, 14 assists, in... get this 14 games played. Wow. Talk about production. Jim Sullivan is the only other player in the neighborhood with four less points in 3 more games played. Jim finsihed 3rd , statistically the head of a group of 3 players (Roman, and Larry) that finished with 22 points. Kevin Parker was second with 25 just falling short of the title. Everyone in this group of top five had an excellent season. Great work everyone.

Time to give out some Awards

MVP: Nelson Sharfman. See the aforementioned scoring title paragraph. Nelson always brings it, and is a constant reminder that hard work and effort is the only way to approach this game... that is... if you want to have any success. Great season Nelson.

Rookie of the Year: Mark Reynolds. Mark was the new addition this summer and instantly became a producer as a member of the Duxbury Duo when teamed with Pete Capraro on the ice. Mark played great for a guy who had been inactive for a few years before lacing them up again. Mark finished with 19 points on 17 games played, good for 6th place in the scoring. Mark was also a key organizer for the Hockey at the Beach event which went off without a hitch. Good job. Nice to have you aboard Mark.

Lady Byng: Dan Gregson. This is a new one. I'm going to give out to the guy who plays the most games without taking a penalty. This season Dan just edged out Scott Pounds with 21 games (Scott had 20) without going to the sin bin. Other notables were Sully (17), Matt Elliot (16) and Chuck Slate (15).

Vezina: Brian Carey. Brian did a great job in his first full season with the clubs. He had 17 games played and ended with a very solid 10-6-1 record and a 2.65GAA which is just about all you can ask for when playing D level hockey. Brian turned in a stout performance in the Schlitz Championship Game and picked up the only two shutout wins of the season against the 'suckas, and Last Call. Great work. Nice to have you aboard too.

Playoff MVP: Jim Sullivan. This one was tough. Jim had 7 points in 5 games including 5 total goals and an assist in the Suds Championship Game win. He just squeeked ahead of Larry (6 pts/5gms) and the duo of Valenti and Parker who both had 6pts/6gms. Heck we'll throw Jeff a bone and mention that he finished the playoffs with 5 in 7 to round out the top 5. Sully was solid and always a big contributor so he wins the Playoff MVP for this season. Great work.

Mike Campbell Award: Mike Campbell. No blurb necessary... But I will mention that the second place spot competition has picked up quite a bit with George and Valenti challenging regular favorites Larry and Hammitt for the PIMs title.

Great work everyone... I have to post this before the winter season is half over so that will be all from here. Please feel free to comment or add any tid-bits parking lot or otherwise to the comments section. Really... please comment.... thanks.

Suds fall to Sparta! Open season with loss.

Schlitz (1) vs Spartans

Thursday Sept. 25th

9:00pm Brockton

3-1 Loss.

The blogger was definitly not on scene for this one, still recovering from that short off season. Here are a team of guest bloggers to tell you all about it. Lets start off with a word from Dr. Scott Pounds who checked in with a very nice recap:

"We lost 3-1.

We started the game with 9: Campbell, DWH, and Mike Daley on D; Gregson, Elliot and new Ken; Scot, Chris Foz and Kilroy lines. Nelson showed up a few minutes in and took over center for Elliot, who moved to D. iJosh appeared shortly after that and began as the floater. When Kilroy took a hard shot off the ankle and new Ken discovered that his skating muscles were way flabby, iJosh, Kilroy and new Ken rotated quickly at right wing. Scot and Gregson rotated left.

The game was competitive. Brian made a bunch of nice saves. The Spartans just had that little bit of edge. One pudgy guy scored two pretty goals after keeping the puck on his stick through our zone. The golden boys were never out of it, and I think we may have outshot them overall. We had some outstanding chances in close and were rotating in the zone pretty well. Coach George would have approved, but we could not get one past the keeper until iJosh wrested one into the far corner after some pretty passing by the Schlitz.

New guy Ken had some good instincts remaining from his high school playing days and is also the early leader for the Mike Campbell Trophy after being called for interference in front of the Spartan net, then jawing with one of the Spartans followed by disputing the refs version of reality. He obviously has a bright future in either red or gold.

Overheard in the 4th period during a discussion of whether you would be attracted to a woman who was your twin:
iJosh: (to Gregson) There’s a woman at my work who looks just like you - without the beard.
Gregson: So she’s hot?

Outstanding... in every way Doctor... thanks very much.

Let's continue with world class guestblogger iJosh with an excellent recap:

"Game 1 of the Back to Back to Back defense of the League Title began with a sputter. It certainly was not for lack of effort. Nor was it for a lack of chances. The Maroon and Gold were in this game most the way. But, and I'll save you from looking at the end of the blog, did not end well as our Heroes would fall 3-1.

The game would start....um....actually I don't know. Due to some traffic and a late arriving person, who shall remain nameless but goes by the title of my wife, I was unable to see much if any of the 1st period. So as I arrived on the ice it was already 1-0 Spartans.
So the 2nd period began with the following: Defense: Mike Campbell, Matt Elliott, New Daddy with Hands as well as the return of Mike Daley. The forwards would line up with: Gritty Old Nelson, CEO Kilroy, Dan Gregson, Dr. Pounds, Chris Foz, Rookie Ken Douville and late arriving iJosh.

The second period would see a fair amount of chances by the Gold. iJosh would miss on the doorstep, just barely getting stuffed as Chris Foz and Kilroy set him up with a rebound (that almost made it in as well). That would be followed by Foz getting some good chances after being cycled the puck from down low. But nothing to show. The Spartans would throw some pressure on too, but Brian would respond time and again. Finally though the Spartan would pierce the armor and improve on their lead 2-0 Green.

Into the 3rd, the Beercans would continue to press. This time DWH would miss in close twice. Once a last second deflection would ruin what would have been a goal. Then on a rush, DWH would get broken up, only to find the puck between his skates. He would collect the puck and flip the backhand just a bit high and over the glass. Later in the 3rd the Green would again improve their lead. This time a "look what I found" goal as the puck would rattle around and find its way to an enemy stick, where it would be tipped by Brian. 3-0 Green. Now the Schlitz would need to press to get back into the game, or at bare minimum avoid the shutout. The chances would get slimmer as time would wind down. With roughly 5 minutes to go, Ken Douville would be shown what the inside of the Brockton penalty box looked like after he took issue with an open ice take down. None-the-less, it would leave the Gold down a man. With only a few ticks remaining on the clock, Chris Foz and Mike Campbell would make their attempt at a score. This created a loose puck that iJosh would one-time into the top right corner to trim the deficit to 3-1. Though that would be all the Gold would have.

But despite the loss it was nice to have Mike Daley back. And Ken D looked good despite the rust and lack of wind (its only been 7 years Ken you should be fine by next game). Just like the past few seasons, it appears that we start with a loss. I'll take a game one loss, because if our history is any indication we won't lose the last game."

Great work as always iJosh!

Here's Chris Fosdick (responding to my email...): "It wasn't Elliot that scored, it was iJosh from me. There was a penalty. I know new guy Ken had one. (BTW he showed good hustle and some talent)

You know the Spartans have a few guys who are playing down a level, so its tough, but we played them quite close. Very even back and forth, both teams having moments of good pressure. I would say that overall we probably had more good chances than they did, but they had a hot goalie, and so it goes. Good game even though we lost."

And one from Mike Campbell: "Josh had the goal. Ken (the new guy) wants to be a goon. He got the only penalty. Well fought game. Brian played well. Elliot and I were the Defensive pair on the ice for all three goals."

This gem from Mike Daley: "Highlight was Lizzy pulling into the parking lot at 11:00 well after most had gone home. Scott and iJosh extended the 4th with her. Gregson, Elliott, and I had to call it a night at that point."

Good stuff all around. Not the desired outcome...but hey...we'll get to that.

Looks like next week we have the first of the 'daveurs starting up right away.

See you Tuesday night Sept.30th in Hingham at 10:20pm

Whew! That was fast. First game tonight!

Schlitz (1) vs Spartans

Thursday Sept. 25

9:00pm Brockton

The shortest off season in league and team history ends tonight at Nine o'clock in Brockton when the Schlitz, fresh off the three-peat victory over the Scapegoats last Thursday night take on winter rival the Spartans in the first game of the winter 08/09 season. Haven't played these guys in almost a year, nor have we had much success (1-2-0) in the BE. (Blog Era). I recall they are similar to our friends the Scapegoats, Blues, and Tigers as a comparison.

Good luck tonight, getting off to a good start. Last time we started the season in Brockton... it wasn't pretty.

Here is the current roster for tonight's game.

SCHLITZ

Campbell

Chris Foz

iJosh

Nelson

Scott

Kilroy

Gregson

DWH (Herbert)

Elliot

Mike Daley

Ken Douville

Brian Carey in Net

The blogger wants to give a shout out to some of our new Rookie Class. We've got 3 newbies joining the 'daveur ranks and a few returning faces.

Please join the blogger in welcoming

Ken Douville, Mike Fitzpatrick (played with us once), and Carl Shiller

Also, former Rookie of the Year Award winner (07/08) Mike Daley is back from a summer hiatus.

Look forward to seeing you all on the ice.

The blogger also apologises for not having the season wrap, including playoff and total statistics post finished up yet... but its on the way. See reference to "shortest off season ever..." above.

Go Suds. Go Zombies.

Suds Beat Goats for Championship!

Schlitz vs Scapegoats
Olympic Div Championship
Thursday Sept. 18th
Canton 9:30pm

2-1 WIN WIN WIN!


Another season, another chance for the skating beercans to play for the title. This time around there were interesting circumstances (well… really when isnt there?) the team wasn’t sure they were playing until the result of the Sitniks/Inglejacks game on Monday night. Then after calculating the tiebreakers and a special email conference from the league it was worked out. On the graces of their goals against The Schlitz, at 2-1 had the chance to play the 3-0 and looking unbeatable Scapegoats for the division championship. This, even after the Suds had taken a sound thrashing from these very Goats in game number 2 of this playoff season. So thanks to the collapse of the Soviets/Sitniks the Suds were in. You really can’t ask for more team. The teams were put in separate divisions, but still managed to make their respective championship games. Team Zombie had their chance on Monday night, but fell short against El Tigre. So last night Larry’s Suds took on the mighty Goats for the title.

It just also happens that the blogger found some work to do and stayed late at the office so he could be there to take in the proceedings. It would be a shame, wouldn’t it friend reader of the blog, if the team won and no one was there to record the moment? So as the teams took the ice, a full 13 (after a late showing Larry, Valenti and Chuck got their act together) for the Suds and the blogger doing his best Mike Millbury impression behind the bench. Here’s how your Suds Championship Game Roster Looked.
D1; Campbell, Capt.George
D2; James, Valenti
O1; Larry, Chris Foz, Gregson
O2; Nelson, Hammitt, Sullivan
O3; Matvey, Chuck, Blake
Coach: Blogger

The Goats would take the ice with only about 8 or 9 players to start. This meant the ‘cans had the early advantage, particularly since the man everyone was looking for (number 18) was not in attendance. In the early going Team Gold tried to establish short shifts and pushed the game right at the Goats trying to get to them a soon as possible. This led to some early chances and the Gold sustained a few shifts of pressure in the ‘goats end.
It was the second or third full time through the lines when the game took its first break. In a typical hard work effort Nelson and Sully worked back and forth to each other in the offensive zone. As the goats scrambled Valenti slid way down from the point all the way to the low slot on the goalies right. Nelson worked to Sully (or the other way around) then over to Valenti who was all alone and buried the first goal of the game.
The Gold seemed to take it in stride and continued the hard work and pressure, but things were changing on the goats bench. Two players came in about the time of the goal. Then at the 9 minute mark the man we’d been waiting for showed up. 18 immediately took a few shifts and unloaded a few of his trademark blistering slappers. Big Kudos to Big Mike Campbell for taking his first blast right off the shin pads. It was clear the gold would have to pay attention. The first period would end with the good guys up 1-0. The second would see the start of a disturbing trend of Gold players going to the box. The first up was Campbell at 15:33 in the second for a rough. The Gold knuckled up and killed the penalty with noteoworthy performances from both Matvey and Chuck on the kill.

The Gold would stay after it protecting the one goal lead. Brian Carey made a Huge stop on a nice shot with 6:50 in the second that help keep team Suds alive. Unfortunately they wouldn't make it out of the period unscathed as the 'Goats would score on a long break with 2:13 left in the second to tie it up. To make matters worse the Suds would take another penalty with only secons left on the clock in the second so we would start the third, tied 1-1 but on the PK again.

So there you have it. One period to go for the trophy and a man down out of the gate. Again the Gold would do a very nice job on the kill, but more trouble came nearly as soon as the kill was completed. This time Hammitt would get a whistle at 14:30 for a high stick and (trend here...) the Gold would scramble, once again successfully, through another man down situation. The good news was that so far all the kills were successfull, the bad news was that we weren't done... by a long shot.
With just over 10 minutes in the game it took another big shift. Greg James took the puck from our own blue line (just inside) and charged up the right side. He worked low, drawing all kinds of attention then ripped one in front where Matvey, parked on the doorstep plopped it into the net for a 2-1 lead. Things were looking good for the Suds, but the Goats were pressing all the harder as we went down the streatch.

Less than a minute after the goal Brian would have another huge save, this time on thier guy #18 that squelched a good chance by the goats. The Gold would counter with strong shifts from Larry's line, and a great chance by Chuck right in front just under 4 minutes.
The pressure mounted as we entered the final minutes. Unfortunatley the Zebra's whistle was not done for the night. at 2:16 Nelson was called for a slash as he covered (albeit agressively) the opposing player in the slot. Iffy... no question of contact... but with 2 min left in the championship game? Curious. Back to the kill.

Despite some great work, and being able to clear the puck a few times, the Gold were dumbfounded when the whistle sounded again. This time Hammitt for a rough with 1:29 remaining. Again, no question of contact, but suddenly the stuff that was going free all game was now getting called. At the very least this penalty got a matching call so the teams stayed at 5-4. Lets note here that the verbal outrage from the Gold bench, and on the ice was not buying us any good will at all with the zebs...especailly comments about them "throwing the game". While I understand, (and agree) with the sentiment, it only pissed them off to the point where the younger guy was yelling back at the bench.
Both pairs of D did great work in these final minutes. Like wise Larry and co. up front were digging hard to keep the puck out to the goats hands.

As hard as this may be to believe friend, the Zebras weren't done. The Ref calls George with 53 seconds remaining for an "interference" (likely the product of our own mouths). Now the Gold faced a 2 man down situation, and the 'goats would pull their keeper to make it 6-3 until Nelson came out of the box. This only lasted a short time, but it was long enough.
Just in case you are keeping track, that's 4 penalites in the 3rd period, another in the last 10 seconds of the 2nd (so really 5 kills in the third), and 3 of those inside the last 2:30. If that doesn't say something about the Referre's willingness to make calls against us... I dont know what does.

Nelson would join Larry and I can't recall which D pair (I'm sorry guys) to work the final 30 seconds of the game. The goats would get one more good chance but Brian Carey sucked it up with 10 seconds on the clock to shut it down.
The Gold would escape with the win as they kept the puck away for the last few ticks of the clock.

Great work by everyone in a real thriller that makes a veritable 3-Peat for the guys with the Beer Label on the Jerseys.
Game Stars
3rd Star: The D corps. This is kind of a cop out because they all deserve big time credit. Mike Campbell, Greg James, George Moorachian, and Marc Valenti outworked the 'goats forwards all night and did a tremendous job clearing the zone on the MULTIPLE penalty kills. These guys were the backbone of everything that happend in this game.
2nd Star: Matvey for the Game winner. Right where he needed to be!
1st Star: Brian Carey. Great work, and a bunch of really solid saves that kept this one winnable. Clearly Brian picked the right night to turn in one of his best performances of the season. Thanks!

Overheard in the Locker Room: From MC "Next seasons mantra should be, no one, not anyone, regardless of the situation can talk to a zebra... about anything." Seconded.

Great work by everyone. Nice to leave the game with shirts and a trophy and this one was a bit unlikely given the fact that this team had handed it to us, nearly the exact same roster, just 2 weeks before. Everyone on the roster earned their shirt. Congrats.

The blogger also wants to thank Emma, Grace and Scout for posing with Dad's new trophy and adding some genuine "cuteness" to the blog. Thanks!

Gregson and Chuck looking good (not cute) in thier new shirts.

Jacks beat Ruskies! Schlitz to Championship!

Schlitz vs Scapegoats

Olympic Division Championship

Thursday September 18th

Canton 9:30pm

Thanks to the Inglewood Jacks 7-2 thumping of our Commrades in arms the Sitniks last night (after the Cadaver's lost thier Championship game to the Tigers), the Schlitz are now scheduled for a HUGE rematch with the Scapegoats for the Olympic Division Championship.

That's right kids we get one more crack at this and the Suds look to make it 3 in a row in Championship Games. Get your availablilty in to CEO Kilroy RIGHT NOW! Lets have a great turnout and a great game against the 'goats. Similar to the Tigers these guys ALWAYS play us tough and we will have our work cut out for us.

See you Thursday night Suds!

Matvey

Nelson

Chris Foz

Larry

Jasse (out)

Hammitt

Gregson

Herbert

Greg

George

Underhill

Chuck

Tigers eat Zombies for Div. Championship

Tigers vs Cadavers
Stanley Cup Division
Summer Championship
Monday September 15th
Dedham 9:00pm

5-2 Loss

Another season, another chance to take home some hardware, and another chance to play our formidable division rival the Tigers. Last night both teams went into the Championship game with 3-0 records and a good streak of playing, and the Zombies knew they would have thier hands full. There was almost 100% attendance with only George subbing in for Matt Elliott/Kilroy (there were 14). So the Dead in Red started off with 13 on the roster but only 12 skaters to start the game.
Turns out Sully was late due to a flat tire in the Friendly's parking lot. Sully quick found a service station that had some air, pumped it up and made it to the game, just over the 1/2 way point. Kudos to Sully to keep after it and make it to the game, but by the time he took the ice the outcome was well on the way to being decided. We skated with 3 wing sets, and 2 centers until he got there.
Here was how things broke down with a full roster.
D Pairs: Campbell - George, Valenti - Pearlman
Offense 1: Sully, Parker, Reynolds
Offense 2: Roman, Jeff, Capraro
Offense 3: iJosh, Ken, Scott

This was really so similar to so many of the games we have played against the Tigers. The Red came out strong in the first period. There were lots of chances and good strong short shifts that resulted in a bunch of time being spend in the Cat's end. Pete Capraro would break the ice after he took a pass from winger Mark Reynolds that sprung him on a breakaway. Using the pattented Sega NHL '96 "The Move" Pete worked the goalie across the crease and tucked it away for the 1-0 lead with about 2 minutes left in the period. The Red stayed strong and worked hard, Lizzy threw in a couple of good stops and at the end of the first it was 1-0 good guys.

Then the Red would continue the good momentum and Kevin Parker would bury a hard work effort (unassisted) and the Red would take the dreaded, infamous, ominous 2-0 lead over team Tigre about 3 minutes into the 2nd. About a minute of playing time later Pearlman would be whistled off for a trip. The Tigers wasted no time and scored after a bang bang play to get on the board with a power play goal.
Up 2-1 but with the Tigers starting to press the Red seemed to lose much of the early momentum. A mistake in our own end popped the puck from our D to their forward right in front and the Tigers would tie the game 9 minutes into the second. The Red would further compound the problem with ANOTHER turnover in our end that put the puck right on the Tiger forward's stick and then in the net for a 3-2 lead. This one was actually another power play goal toward the end of the period when 77 had been called for a trip. To the 3rd, down 3-2.
I wish I could tell you all about a glorious comeback, about the grit and determination of Zombie Pride and a great effort in the third... but I can't. It didn't happen. Whatever the Red had in the first, they went further away from it instead of closer to it as the game went on.
The Tigers would score again right off the faceoff on Lizzy's right aobut 3 minutes into the third. That would put them up 4-2 and the Red had some serious work cut out for it. There were chances, by the scoresheet the Zombies took 9 shots (most of the game) in the third but it didn't seem like the Tiger keeper was really that challenged as time wore away. There was one more penalty (77 again) and the Tigers would put the capper home just as it expired to take the game 5-2 and win the division championship.

It was a tough night for the Dead in Red, but lets give it up for the cats. Those guys played hard all night and clearly deserved the win. Those guys are a good group and always give us a run for our money. So no summer championship for the Cads but.....

in the nightcap game the Ingwood Jacks put a hurting on the Sitniks and may have just landed the Beercan's in a rematch with the Scapegoats for the Olympic Division Championship on Thursday night. Stay tuned to blog and email for details!

Big Props go out to the guys with Jules on the jersey for "helping out" the Schlitz make it one more game!

"Mmm that IS a tastey burger..."

Tonight Zombies vs. Cats for Championship

Monday September 15th
Cadavers (3-0) vs Tigers (3-0)
Stanley Cup Division Championship
Dedham 9:00pm

This is it kids! Team Zombie takes the ice against the formidable El Tigre for the Division Championship. Get your skates sharpened, eat your lucky pregame meal, bring a fan or two, bring some extra beer, whatever you do just BRING IT!
Tonight.

Go Zombies Go.

Lizzy in Net
Campbell, Jeff, Pearlman, Valenti
Roman, iJosh, Ken, Scott, Parker, Capraro,
Reynolds, Sullivan, George

Which one are you?

This one comes in from Larry... and is phenominal.

I had to post it here for all to enjoy.

Thanks again Larry.

It's a well-known fact that there are only two seasons in Canada: summerand hockey. According to long-standing tradition, the former starts withthe hoisting of the Stanley Cup, as fans in an American city celebrate.The latter officially kicks off after Labour Day weekend.

In fact, there are hundreds, possibly thousands, of managers acrossCanada who will spend the long weekend making personnel decisions intime for the September dawn of a new season. Granted, the majority ofthese managers are in charge of teams with names like "Old Puckers","Rusty Blades", "Just the Tips" and "Nine-Inch Males," but don't befooled; beer-league hockey squads can be downright tricky to puttogether. As with any successful organization, you need the right mix,and that means drafting from the following beer-league player categories: Which one are you???

The Ringer

Some teams wait until the playoffs to unveil this option. Others go with it right from the opening face-off. Either way, without a ringer, your team is done. The challenge for managers is convincing a good player to suit up for a bad side. This can be accomplished a number of ways,including promises of goal-scoring glory and awe-inspired teammates. Most effective, however, is let him play for free. It's simple math, really. Everyone else pays an extra $50 and everyone else gets a shot at the "DD" Division title.

The Young Guy

At first glance, he can easily be mistaken for a ringer, since the young guy still wears the shorts and socks of his junior or college team. Butit's time for the next phase of life now, and that means an office job.The young guy stays in shape for the first half of the year. Sadly, an increasingly sedentary existence and late night partying catches up to him by Christmas. 15 to 20 pounds later, he's just another player, huffing and puffing with the rest. Welcome aboard, kid.

The Old Guy
Forget the 50-and-over league; that's not for him...even though his gloves reach up to his armpits, and he still uses a wood stick. To be fair, the old guy can be an effective player, especially if he's a wily old guy -- a hook here and a chop there, because that's how they did it when professional athletes were real men. "Eddie Shore -- now there wasa hockey player! Lost an ear against the Maroons. Sewed it back on himself. Never missed a shift."

The Tardy Goalie

Hey, thanks for showing up. Only five minutes gone in the first. Not like you play a crucial position or anything. Take your time, #$%^head.

The Beginner

Required only for cheap laughs. On the one hand, you have to admire the beginner. It takes a lot of courage to buy all brand new equipment, andtake up hockey in your 40's. On the other hand, learn to take a pass, man. It's right on your stick, for Christ's sake. How does that knock youover?And now you're friggin offside! Not to mention the Beginner showsup at every game, no matter what time or what day. Sunday night playoffgame at 11PM - no worries, Mr Beginner will be there.

The Complete Psycho

Also good for a few giggles . . . from afar. Most likely a cop orfireman. The complete psycho is capable of anything: running the goalie, challenging an entire bench, a tomahawk chop -- all in the repertoire. Do not feed the complete psycho. He doesn't want to be fed. He wants to hunt. And, look to him to carry on his act in the bar after the game.

The Naked Guy

Bane of the dressing room. Most players have the courtesy to stretchtheir hamstrings while sporting, at the very least, a bit of underwear. Not the naked guy. He'll carry on full conversations, and you had better maintain eye contact like your life depended on it....or come face to face with the swinging sausage.

The Guy with the New Girlfriend

An excellent way to lower everyone else's fees is to load up on a few of these. The guy with the new girlfriend will show up to three games,tops, so his payment will contribute to everyone else's and it's not like you'll lose ice time by putting him on the roster. That said,beware that the guy with the new girlfriend might very well turn intothe guy with the new wife...at which point he'll never miss another game.

The Organizer

This guy is absolutely brutal but since nobody else could be bothered to do all the paperwork and collect the money he gets to play. Is frustrating to play with because they can barely skate let alone take a pass but nobody gets mad at him cuz he's a really nice guy. Is often heard in the dressing room saying 'Sorry guys, that one was my fault' and if he's lucky somebody will chip in something like 'No worries Donny, it's a team effort.' What everybody is really thinking is 'Hey Donny, my grandmother is a better player than you and yes you are right, that was your fault.' If you are lucky the Organizer is usually smart Enough to take himself off the ice in critical situations.

The Minor Hockey Allstar

Looks promising at a glance as they fool you with reasonably good skills but after you get zero passes you'll get the picture. This guy topped out at 'AA' Midget and can be spotted by the huge blinders attached to his helmet. Play is characterized by energetic rushes down the wing, (no passing), then into the corner (still no pass), behind the net (hey#$%^head I've been open for the past 5 minutes), then into the nextcorner (everybody has gone back to the bench to watch) followed by a blind give away pass to the high slot / break out pass for the other team. Cut this guy.

The Johnny Try Hard

Great to have on your team but they suck to play against because they have somehow managed to keep themselves in ridiculously good shape. They were probably the star on their high school hockey team and won athlete of the year because they played hockey, volleyball and track all in the same year. Guaranteed they have a membership at the 'RunningRoom'. Play is characterized by constant hustle which if caught offguard can embarrass the more talented yet fatter player.

The Stanley Cup Champion

This player will raise their hands and cheer when they score. If this is an opposing player you must nip this behaviour in the bud by catching him off guard with a sickening open ice hit that causes him to blow snotbubbles. If this player is on your team quickly chastise him in front of the other team to let them know that this is not how the rest of your team rolls. Remind him how much of a loser he is by retrieving the puckfrom the net the next time he scores and presenting it to him in front of the other team.

The Tough Guy

This guy maxed out at the house-league level, has never been in a fight and is characterized by antagonizing behaviour on the ice. In extremecases he will 'cheap shot' another player. The fact that your beerleague does not allow fighting has given this guy a false sense ofcourage. What this guy does not realize is that this will not prevent someone from knocking his teeth out if he cheap shots the wrong guy. There is a number of fun ways to handle this player which all end with him lying on the ice bleeding, looking for his teeth and crying.

The Wrong Guy

Not to be confused with 'The Complete Psycho'. This guy shows up, doesn't say much and pretty much flies under the radar screen. The kid that gave him the cheap shot him will eventually look his name up on Hockey DB after his facial surgery and realize he had 355 pims in the East Cost 3 years ago.

The Gary Roberts

Can be described as being way too intense. This guy is one of your better players but is unable to adjust to the lower level of play. At the best of times he will try to coach players on the fly and at the worst of times he will snap and call his entire team a bunch of house-leaguers. He believes the game should be played a certain way and despises 'pond hockey' style play with no back checking or positional assignments. Most likely is suffering from a complex of 'unfinished business' from his previous hockey career and is looking to capture some shred of glory via the rec-league championship. This guy is probably better off playing with his own kind in a senior-A league.

Suds down the Blues!

Schlitz (P3) vs Blues
Tuesday Sept 9th
Dedham 9:00pm

2-1 Win!


Another classic playoff bout with our old friends the Blues. This one had it all. Lots of chances, plenty of chippy play and a really good skate all the way around. We even threw in some hard feelings at the end just for good measure. Seriously, even though the chippyness got a little out of hand at the end, we always have fun, very competitive games against these guys, and last night was no exception.

The game was (as you can tell from the score) a very close to the vest affair from start to finish. No goals scored until the third period. The first two periods were filled with the occasional penalty, sound goal tending from both ends, lots of shots, a few odd man rushes each way, and plenty of chattah.

The Suds had a few guys that couldn't make it, so there were the prerequisite subs that had a few of the Proud Zombies filling in for the 'cans. Here is how the roster broke down.


Brian Carey in Net.
DWH, Capt George and Greg James, Valenti as D pairs.
Offense 1: Larry, Parker, and Reynolds
Offense 2: Jeff, Matvey, and Hammitt
Offense 3: Chuck, Gregson, and Blake


The Blues had a full bench as well, and some very sharp new unis. At least this was the first time I'd skated against them with the new sweaters. The game got underway and was pretty fast paced for the whole first period. Other than a few chances here and there, and a handful of penalties [2 for them, 1 for us (Hammitt)], there wasn't much that was notable. Of course the fact that THEY were the ones frustrated and talking to the refs was not only out of the ordinary, but a nice change of pace.

The second period went much like the first. They took another pair of penalties, we took one (Parker). Everything played out even. There were a bunch more chances, Larry's line had some good opportunities. The Chuck, Blake, and Gregson line also showed their pluck, with a few chances also. Kudos to Blake for getting in there and taking the abuse up front. The period ended with a chance by the Larry line followed by a clean 2 on 0 for the Blues that Brian shutdown just before time expired.

Into the third period we go still tied 0-0. At this point the refs came over to both benches and stated that they didn't want the game to be decided by a penalty. They were letting a lot go and things were definitely becoming chippy. Nothing out of hand, but as usual our mouths were in full effect, and things were certainly getting tense.
The Golden Schlitz was clearly gaining some momentum. As the Blues probably had more chances in the first, the Gold certainly out shot them in the second. The third continued that trend. Then there was a breakthrough.

At the 13 minute mark, Jeff won a faceoff in the Blues end and sent the puck wide to Hammitt on the left side. Matvey crossed to the middle and took a quick pass from Ham and sent it right into the far side of the net for the 1-0 lead. Nice work by Ham and Matvey to pass and shoot quickly, I dont think their keeper even saw it.
Things progressed as time went down past 8, 7 minutes left. Then the Blues won a faceoff in our end and sent it to the point. Our old friend (and Blues Captain) number 35 was there and let loose a nifty slapper that found its way past Brian and tied the game with 6:45 remaining.

Again, sticks were gripped slightly tighter, shifts came quicker and harder. Then with just under four minutes, Blake takes a big hit in the Blues end and draws a call. He was right where he needed to be and drew it perfectly. The Gold STILL couldn't capitalize on the power play, but got several chances.

Then the chippyness got a bit out of hand. With a minute forty remaining Jeff was sparring with a Blue defensemen in front of their net. The defenseman, #3 chopped Jeff to the ice and the zebras arm went up. Just for good measure, or maybe just because he is a raging asshole, #3 then cross checked Jeff across the back of his neck and shoulders while he was still down, and had his back to him. Very... very uncool. Jeff was... um... upset. The blogger winces at the thought of what he said when he got up... angry. Jeff tried to slash the guy and I guess connected (feebly due to stars, planets, birds... circling his head) and the zebras broke it up. Jeff went to the box, #3 was ejected, and the Gold was left with a power play.
At one point the ref comes over to the bench asking for the Captain... to which Parker responds.
"You just put him in the F*king box! Why dont you go see him?"
Eventually the Gold bench settled down and the play went on.

The Gold kept it in the Blues end and looked to have some quick chances. Larry won a faceoff and shuttled the puck over to Parker. Parker sent it to Valenti at the left point and Marc wristed one through traffic that beat the goalie and gave the Schlitz a 2-1 lead with :43 seconds remaining.
That was how this one would end. The Schlitz stay alive, but need help to advance in the playoffs from here.
Just a word about the whole cheap-shot and #3 thing.... the blogger is reluctant to do this because talking afterward just rarely serves any purpose... but what the hell. I have a word or two for you #3 (marked Feury on the scoresheet).

You cheap shot bastard. I know this aint tennis, and our two teams have had plenty of "spirited" matchups over the years. You took it too far. To hit a man on his knees, with his back turned, and to not just hit him but cross check him hard in the back of the head and shoulders is just filthy. I have no threats (I spend enough time telling my own guys to shut up) but I do have a pair of promises for you.

1. I will be waiting for the winter season schedule with great anticipation, and highlighting the name Blues as soon as I get it.

2. You can be sure that I will be there, and will gladly remind you, face to face, of your actions last night, and of course how I feel today(bad), (not) sleeping last night, and my basic interpretation of Karma.
See you then.

Game Stars
3rd Star: The defensive corps. DWH, George, James, and Brian. (see Valenti below)Great work all night boys. The Blues had a hard time keeping it in our zone thanks to you.
2nd Star: Matvey with a nod to Hammit on the first goal. Good work guys.
1st Star: Marc Valenti for the game winner... and apparently $20 bucks from his wife!

So here is the deal for the Championship Game. The Scapegoats play the Last Call and we will for argument's sake assume they win. That makes them the #1 team with a 3-0 record. Then the Sitniks play the Inglewood Jacks right after the Cads play the Tigers for the SC Div Championship. IF the Sitniks lose, AND score less than 3 goals, AND if the Jacks score less than 5 goals the Schlitz will advance to play the Scapegoats. However if the Sitniks win, they automatically will play the 'goats and the Schlitz are done. Got it? Details when they happen.

Tonight Schlitz vs Blues!

Schlitz (1-1) vs Blues (1-1)
Tuesday September 9th
Dedham 9:00pm

The Beercans face off against our old rival the Blues tonight in Dedham. The Blues, who are sporting some niffty new Unis, are 1-1 courtesy of a 1-0 bye win (best record)and then a 5-1 loss at the hands of the CH Terriers. Both teams must win to have a hope for advancement.
The Beercans romped on Last Call (6-0) then got romped by the Scapegoats (6-2). The Suds face an uphill climb here, and will need help elsewhere even if they can beat the Blues. The Sitniks (Commie Bastards) and the Scapegoats are both 2-0 and one team will need to lose to get the Suds in. Even then it will come down to total goals with the Schlitz having 8, the 'goats 12, and the 'niks 7. So the most likely is if the Sitniks lose without scoring many and the 'cans win tonight big. That would buy a rematch with the 'goats.
However.... lets look at the task at hand. We haven't seen the Blues much lately the last time back in July. Lets get a good turnout and see if we can't get over on these guys in the playoffs for once.

Here is tonights roster as it stands right now.

Brian Carey in Net.

Herbert, James, Valenti, George

LB(SW), Matvey, Hammitt,

Gregson, Parker, Underhill,

Slate, Reynolds, Jeff

Zombies Beat Runners!

Cadavers (P3) vs Double Runners

Monday September 8th

Canton 10:40pm

4-2 Win!

Another big playoff tilt for the Dead in Red last night at home rink Canton. The Zombies faced an elimination game with the Double Runners for the Stanley Cup Division Playoffs. The winner of this game would move on to face Team Tigre (tea-grey) next Monday night in Dedham for the trophy.

A solid turnout gave the Red 13 including Captain George who filled in for D Man Marc Valenti at the last minute. The rest of the crew broke down like this.

Lizzy in Net. (Mom in the stands)

D Pairs: George and Pearlman. Fosdick and Campbell

Offense 1: Roman, Capraro and Reynolds

Offense 2: Sully, Elliott and Pounds

Offense 3: iJosh, Parker and Kenny

The Runners looked solid but had only 9 and things were pretty tight for the first few minutes of the game. It was interesting to note... that along with the Hometown rink we got our favorite pair of "hometown" refs, the Butterball and his sidekick Grampanoteeth. Now we see these guys all the time, and we've had plenty of run-ins with them. They love us... I mean Looooooove us. It was clear from the start that our rotund and striped friend had a buddy or two on the Runners and made no bones about it. This developed into a theme.. as much as the blogger despises it.. it must be mentioned.

With that in mind.... George goes off at 13:21 of the first for an innocuous lift of the stick that was called "hooking". Okay, the Red do an admirable job on the PK and things are still 0-0 a few minutes later.

In fact things went well. Working off a nice hard work play from Kevin Parker (when isnt it?) Billy Pearlman put the Dead on the board and out in front at 7:55 remaining in the first. Nice slapper from the point.

Wouldn't you know... our best skater George gets whistled at 6:21 for "unsports"... ? Hmn? This one, as the blogger faintly recalls was a scuffle along the side boards with both guys going at it. Both guys went to the box. Just after this penalty expired the Runners made a nice play keeping it in our end and popped a second or third rebound behind Lizzy to tie the game up. It was a bad scramble on our part and the game was tied going into the second.

The Red would strike again early in the second, to take back the lead. Jim Sullivan followed another solid shot from Pearlman at the point and buried a nice wrist shot for the 2-1 lead. Not long after that Zombie momentum took over. Jeff Fosdick swept up the puck in the neutral zone after iJosh shuttled it back from the faceoff. Jeff wound his way up and into the zone then passed to Kevin Parker on the wide left. Parker took the puck low behind the net for some abuse (I think he likes it...) and none of the D turned to cover Jeff who had collapsed down into the slot. Kevin to Jeff, into the net and a 3-1 lead for Team Zombie. That goal came at 13:46 in the second.

Once again the Zebras turned to the whistle and George went for his third and the eject button at 11:30. That's right, gone for the night 5 minutes into the second. The Red was solid once again and with Lizzy kept the runners at bay. Campbell would go, again full participation from both guys, their guy heads to the box after the whistle, yet only Mike gets the minutes. This was followed by some hearty (and misplaced) jawing that didn't win us any favors.

The third period would open (still 3-1) and see Parker go off for goalie interference... again more jawing... but again there would be good work on the PK. Matt Elliott had filled in for George and skated with Jeff the rest of the night while Billy skated with Mike and the forwards broke out the Sharfman Abacus. Good work by Elliott filling in, and good work keeping things straight up front.

The Runners would climb back in it after Jeff failed to clear from behind Lizzy then the puck would bounce back out front to an open man who would send it home, and pull them within one goal at 8:44 remaining in the game.

The rest of the third was exiting, and there were plenty of chances going both ways. The Runners pulled their keeper with about a minute left but the Red jumped right on it and took it to their end. Ken Goldenberg, who was around the net all night would deflect another Pearlman blast and score the empty netter that would ice the game 4-2.

There were more jabberjawfests with the round zebra which ended with him screaming profanity at our bench... this is just not good in any way for us. Pearlman would go with 21 seconds left things just fell apart. As wrong as the calls were... and they were suspect, all of the icing/offsides crap... there is just nothing we can do about it. One thing is for certain, aside from this guy sucking, and hating us, is that we are gar-un- teeed to see him again... many many times. We can't keep fueling his stupid hate or we will continue to not get a fair shake. The point is NO ONE in a Zombie shirt will get a fair shake, and that just sucks. In the future (the blogger knows this applys to him also) we just HAVE TO KEEP OUR MOUTHS SHUT. We know he's a stooge, but he's probably going to be the stooge reffing the Championship Game next Monday night...

Game Stars

3rd Star: Matt Elliot. Not on the score sheet, but Matty did a great job filling in on D when asked for better than half the game. A true team player stepping up when needed. Thanks.

2nd Star: Kevin Parker. A Sharfmanlike performance (again). A pair of helpers and a truckload of hard work all night long. Positively Masochistic behing the net. Solid.

1st Star: Pearlman. Billy scored the first one with a sweet shot, fed the second one to Sully, and the fourth to Kenny. A good night all the way around for Bill. Nice work.

Honorable Mention 1: Lizzy. Another solid performance from our gal in the pipes. Neither goal could be pinned on her as they came from turnovers and extended action in our own end. Check this out. Liz is 3-0 in the playoffs with a 2.33 GAA so far. Great work.

Honorable Mention 2: Jeff Fosdick for what would be the game winner (bug ups to Parker). Blogger beams with pride.

Overheard in the Parking Lot: "The Teaser. The Pleaser. The Vulcan, the Shocker, and... The Pearlman!!" The last one with Lizzy making a fist and holding up her forearm... sweet.

So. It is on.

Monday September 15th

Dedham 9:00pm

Cadavers (3-0) vs Tigers (3-0)

Stanley Cup Division Championship!

Cadavers Tonight vs. Double Runners

Tonight Monday September 8th

Canton 10:40pm

Cadavers(2-0) vs Double Runners (1-1)

Ok Team. On your toes and heads up. The Playoffs continue tonight with a do or die game between Team Zombie and the Double Runners. The Cads will have to win tonight if they hope to advance to the Stanley Cup Division Championship Game.

The Runners are 1-1 but have 12 total goals thanks to a 10-2 drubbing of the Windsuckers. So enven though the Cads have a better 2-0 record they have only 10 goals scored so if they lose tonight both teams will be 2-1 but the Runners will have the goals advantage and will advance to play the top team from the other side.

El Tigre is 2-0 on the other side of the division and advance if they beat the Windsuckers tonight(the game before us). If they lose... well we will have to figure it out... but they probably wont.

Anyway... the point is the Cadavers will advance if they beat the Double Runners, and if not the season is offically over.

So lets get ready to rumble.

Cadavers Roster

Campbell, Mike 77

Capraro, Pete 52

Elliott, Matt 88

Greenstein, Josh 21

Goldenberg, Ken 51

Fosdick, Jeff 10

Kurin, Roman 13

Parker, Kevin 9

Pearlman, Bill 8

Pounds, Scott 83

Reynolds, Mark 18

Valenti, Marc 11

Sullivan, Jim 23

Just a reminder the Schlitz get back to work Tomorrow at 9pm in Dedham against the Blues. The Schlitz will need a whole lot of help even if they do beat the Blues tomorrow... but you never know. Stay tuned.